while i would never wish my children away some days, i'm tired. i'm just so tired. i hate saying that too. my life is so wonderful. i'm so blessed and i know that. i understand that. but, sometimes, i just want to go away for a little bit. i want to go someplace where no one else needs me. where my body is just that, MY body. i have my old body back (without starving for it). i have my thoughts to myself. i can read a book. my laundry isn't piled in baskets because i dont' have the time to do it and when i have a spare moment, i don't feel like folding it. a place where i can lay in the sun with my ipod on and not be terrified i'll miss the cries of one of my children.
i feel guilty saying all of this. i hate myself for saying this.
i think that's one of the trials of motherhood. it's the balance.
some women...they have it all together. i think it's a physicilogical design of some women. some women dont' care about things. me? i can't let anything go. it's too much.
and i'm tired.
